Quit Lying on Social Media
It’s something we all do. No, not breathe, blink, or grab your stomach in pain after eating Taco Bell. Something we all do…is lie. Some do it out of necessity. Some habitual liars do it without knowing it. No matter how it’s done, everyone does it. And if you say you don’t lie, well you’re lying. It makes me laugh thinking back on some of the lies I’ve told which included:
Saying I co-wrote Eminem’s song “The Real Slim Shady” to impress a group of people in high school…and they believed me.
Telling one of my teachers I forgot to write a paper because I didn’t know what month it was. It was due in November, and in November I thought it was October.
Faking an injury during basketball practice so I wouldn’t have to run sprints.
Telling someone I was John Madden’s (the football coach) grandson and because of that I had tickets to the Super Bowl.
One of those tales is actually a lie. See, I didn’t make it through two paragraphs before I got my Sean Spicer on. And for those three tales that are true, I regret nothing!
All jokes aside, lying is not a good thing. It should go without saying but with “truth isn’t truth” and “alternative facts” running rampant in society, it needs to be reiterated. While I’m at it, let me also reiterate that cigarettes are bad for your health, don’t pet a crocodile, and for the love of god keep your teenage daughter away from R. Kelly when he has a full bladder.
We shouldn’t lie because the truth is, lying destroys trust. Lying destroys relationships. Lying destroys your credibility, i.e., Sean Spicer. Lying can make the believable seem unbelievable. So why do we cry wolf, and why do we do it so often? In some instances some people feel it’s easier to lie than just telling the truth. Others lie because they are so focused on their image. While the list can go on for reasons why, that last one is the point I want to focus on for this topic.
Imagine a place where people love to show off their image? That shouldn’t be too hard to think of because if you didn’t immediately think of social media, slap yourself. Social media is where people are always connected but yet so disconnected. It’s a place that ruins relationships, friendships, and scholarships when your dumbass posts a picture of you wearing a shirt spelling out a racial slur during a high school event. Good luck with college now! While social media does a lot of good, the thing it really has turned into is a place to compare our lives. In doing so, sometimes people are not honest in what they post due to that reason. Some post pictures of themselves with their boyfriend/girlfriend kissing, when in reality they can’t wait to be single. Some post pictures of themselves with a photoshopped butt when we know they don’t have a butt, they more so have a long back. Some post updates on how much they love their job, when in fact, they’ve been unemployed since Kanye West was last tolerable.
People lie about everything. People lie about how happy they are about having kids. Men lie about how much they want to please a woman. Men and women lie about being racist. In the book “Everybody Lies” by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, he reviewed “Big Data” and concluded that many people won’t be open in person. To a Google search bar though, they expose themselves more than Louis C.K. ever has. Adults with kids were 3.6% more likely to tell Google they regret having kids than those who didn’t have kids regretting not having them. I often hear how men want to please a woman, but this book found that men make as many searches looking for ways to preform oral sex on THEMSELVES as they do to give a woman an orgasm. Google searches containing the “N-word” or “N-word” jokes are still very popular across the nation. I am willing to bet, if you asked anyone that did any one of those searches, most would deny doing it. I am also willing to bet, if you lie often, or about any of those topics, you’re probably not that happy of a person.
One thing I’ve discovered since going to therapy is that in order to be happier with yourself, you have to be true to yourself. Lying to yourself is one of those most counter productive things you can do. It’s like washing your hands, and then touching the doorknob of a public restroom with your bare hands afterwards. Congratulations, you now have fecal matter and germs from someone else’s genitals embedded in your fingerprints (don’t be a dick, wash your hands after using the restroom). Putting on a false persona is a full time job, and trying to keep up with it is overtime no one wants to do. Some care more about a fake image they are trying to uphold, than the reality of the bigger picture.
I saw a tweet from a parody account of the actor Bill Murray that was spot on in describing today’s society. “Social media is training us to compare our lives, instead of appreciating everything we are. No wonder why everyone is always depressed.” People love to compete and keep up with each other. That’s why neighbors of lottery winners are significantly more likely to go bankrupt. Why? Well, they spend their money trying to keep up with their lucky and newly rich neighbor by spending money they don’t have. Trying to portray something we are not, or something we know isn’t true, isn’t helpful to anyone especially yourself. It can make you depressed, or broke, or even both.
Spot on Bill, or whoever wrote this…
So if you struggle with confidence issues, or general unhappiness, start with being true at the places you reflect yourself on. That way you don’t have to keep up with your lies. Which can turn into a ridiculous process that drains you every last drop of your happiness. Don’t be afraid of failure, since some people lie because of that. One of the best posts on Facebook that I’ve seen was from one guy I went to college with who posted that he didn’t get an internship he was going for. Instead of lying and saying he got it, or making excuses to why he didn’t get it, he just said he didn’t get it and he’s going keep working on his goal. That’s being true to yourself. If you’re not happy about something don’t keep posting about it like you are. Shanann Watts posted pics of her, and her husband Chris often. If you go on her Facebook account, you would think they had the ideal marriage. It wasn’t until after she was murdered by him, that we found out their marriage wasn’t as good as what was portrayed. I am not saying she was lying about her posts and how she felt about him at that time. However, knowing what we know now, it may shift the way you think about those photos and their relationship.
Shanann Watts, along with her two daughters and unborn child were murdered by her husband Chris Watts. This is a post from Shanann’s Facebook page.
So don’t continue to give us this BS about how great your relationship is, or how well your job is going, or how great of a cook you are if none of it is true. Instead you should work to change that so it becomes true. That will make you happier than any post that is a lie, ever will. Especially some of the food you say you cooked I see posted on social media. Some of those meals, like an ugly person, look awful. So much so, I’d rather eat Taco Bell and endure those stomach pains then try a bite of whatever the hell it is that you cooked for dinner.
